2006-05-19

weeklogging @ 8:17 p.m.

I am entirely unstable at the moment.  This week was just rampant with...insanity.

Monday I was back on the ground from New Orleans and dealing with budgets.  Tuesday I began to crash from the endorphin rush of feeling like a respected and intelligent collaborative partner due to a steering committee meeting and a client meeting about the aforementioned budget amendment.  Wednesday I got all frothed up about the upcoming interview by meeting with my former law prof for a review of legal research high points.  She made an interesting point:

If you don't get the job that seemed like your dream when the interview went incredibly well, it's probably not because they didn't want you, but because they saw something in you that made them think you'd be in utter hell in the position.

Hmm.  Well damn, that's how I got here in the first goddamned place.  I'd surely hate to see it happen again and have my little world come crashing down around me.  Again. 

Yesterday got a huge upswing due to a conversation with a colleague from Missouri who's working on a product similar to mine for the grant work...a call that ended with us developing a pie-in-the sky dream of a project that has a damned good chance of getting funded for an extended period of time.  Woo.  If only.  That's just me trying to prepare for the very real possibility that I might have to stay put where I am.

Here's me, trying not to think about it.