2007-03-26

a week's worth (or so) of stuff @ 8:22 p.m.

One of the entertainment secretaries was after me to tell her when a rather pricy directory ($150+) came in so she could nab it and make copies for the entire group. I'm thinking she means fair use copying; a bit here for one, a page or two here for another. I dutifully ordered it and sent it up to her when it finally came in. A couple of days later, it came back to me with a note that read in part:

I gave this to office services to make copies and I guess they took it apart to make two sided copies. It's okay. The entertainment group is the only one who uses this (I think).

The directory was held together with a binder clip. I took it off and realized that office svcs. had ripped the entire cover off and ripped the pages from the binding to feed it through the copier.

*blink*

Two:

We have two managing partners. One is older and in trusts and estates, the other is in entertainment. The latter I've never met, the former's office is on my floor so we've had some contact, albeit very little. When I came in on Monday, I found the book cart (which is mad swanky for a cart; I picked one specifically that would blend in with the decor) in an old office used for storage. I wasn't in on Friday, so I assumed that was where my filer had left it. I put it back in the non-stack stacks (the collection's been de-centralized and the shelves are mostly used for storage now) where it usually lives. I was talking to one of the staff I supervise when he comes by and looks like he wants to say something.

Partner: Yes, Miss T, wanted to talk to you about something.
Me: Yes, how can I help?
P: That cart *points* it needs to be somewhere else.
Me: *confused and trying to get to the heart of the problem* May ask why and where it should be instead? (if not in what's left of the library, I'm thinking???)
P: *with a shark-like smile like he's gearing up for a skirmish he knows he'll win* Because I want it elsewhere. In that office we use for storage.
Me: Certainly. I'll take care of it. Thanks!

Three:

The giant kitchen/breakroom is on my floor, right down from my "office". Hellish in that I am bombarded with cooking smells for hours around lunchtime. Signs mysteriously appeared a few days ago on the doors that are always shut telling us that we needed to be considerate to others working and keep the noise level down. I'm right there and have never been disturbed. The copy room is right next to it, doors always propped open. They are now shut with the same little onerous signs strictly intructing us that they should always. Be. Closed. Or else. It is now always freezing in there. One of the secretaries on that sife of the floor indicated that this was also T & E partner's doing.

What made me happy the day of the cart incident was that I was able to IM the tech services manager in DC and vent to him about it. He was just as flabbergasted as I once he realized that there was no other reason for the cart to be moved. Not in the hallway. Not in front of books that anyone needed. Not immediately visible to the passing clients. Not ugly as sin. He all but offered to move me to another office ("do you have to stay there?"), but I am happy in ATL and do not want to leave. I made some passing remark about how I was worried that even by asking the partner why he wanted the cart moved was enough to get me fired and he said he didn't think that would happen. I barked a laugh and told him about the guy who worked at the security desk for the property management company who'd given a partner an answer he didn't like and had the guy fired and then said "forgive me if I don't believe you."

My managers and director love me and think I'm doing a great job. The co-workers with whom I interface seem to dig me. But the people around whom I must spend the most time seem intent upon making me as uncomfortable as possible. I'd love to quit because of them, but cannot afford it. Saw a posting go up this week for another firm in the city which would have been perfect for me...except I don't yet have 3 years experience. Guess it's time to start trolling the public health postings again...

More office shenanigans. I'll keep it brief.

The same partner from the previous mofo post and the office biz director (who is notorious for communicating with me when she has to through sticky notes) were standing not 20 feet from me with a gentleman I did not recognize discussing the demolition of the library as if I were not there. Apparently 3 paralegal offices are going to be installed where I and the rest of the nearly empty shelves - decentralized collection, all that's left are several years of M-H - are now ("according to the drawing").

I immediately sent an email to my director and immediate supervisor (we're a national/virtual team) detailing the situation and trying not to panic. I finished up with This troubles me greatly. What is going to happen to me? They, of course, had heard nothing of the plans and told me respectively:

I'm sorry. I have no idea, but I'll find out.

You were right to let us know. Take a deep breath. We will figure it out.

But I just don't see how yet.

Interestingly enough, the first thing that popped up when I opened up my browser on my ISP home page was an article about telecommuting. I can only hope that soon I'll be one of the 2-40 million workers who works from home at least part of the week. In a perfect world, if they think that they don't need me then I sure as fuck don't need them. The balance here is so painfully difficult. If anyone above the people who seem to delight in tormenting me is brought into the mix (which could only be the CEO), the situation would most likely only become worse because you simply can't force people with this much power to simply become happy and content with the application of these changes overnight. But I know that my director's mission is to bring all of the office collections into some sort of order. I figure that for whatever reason, the attorneys neither know nore care what it is I'm supposed to be doing and that the clerk/monkey who was handling the routing and barely glancing at the collection before me was more than sufficient for their needs. And because of that, they probably think that I'm no more skilled/vital/important to the office than he was, degree notifications in my e-mail sig file (put there on purpose) notwithstanding.

I've never been in such an MPD job situation before. My co-workers rock. The research management team loves me and tells me often that I'm doing a bang-up job and that I'm not stupid. I know that they're sick of seeing emails from me that begin with "I know I'm a moron" or "Feel free to tell me that I'm an idiot" or "Be gentle with the feeb", but I am continually made to feel in my physical location that I am not important. Easily expendable. Invisible. A nuisance . Officially In The Way. Inscrutable. Unapprochable. Weird. Generally useless. A misfit.